Not long after my sister’s wedding，one of my father’s colleagues and
his wife dropped in to see Mom and Dad.The guests had not been invited
to the wedding, so when
the woman said，”I’m sorry I didn’t get over to the church the other
day，”Mom assumed she meant the church’s Good Cheer Club Tea and Bazaar.
“I’rn glad you didn’t.”Mom replied.”You never saw such a mob scene!”
“I thought I’d like to see how everyone was dressed，”the guest
said.”What did you wear?”
“Just my old navy print and my oxfords,“said Mom，”and a good
thing，too，as we cleared almost a thousand dollars. “
“Did you take a collection?”the woman gasped.
“Oh, no，“said Mom，”you know how it is，a lot of people come just to
look and you don’t make a thing out of them，so we decided to charge
admission at the door.”
At this point Dad realized signals were crossed，and he suggested to Mom
that she explain that my sister’s wedding had been neither a mob scene
nor a profit-making venture.
A man dirning with a friend explained the peculiarities of the
restaurant they were in:”The waiters never admit they don’t have
something. They’ll take your order. for a slice of sun and too away as
if they mean to get it…then they’ll come back and say they just ran
To prove his point，he said to the waiter,“The dinosaur，please.”
“Yes，sir，“answered the waiter.”And how would you like it cooked?”
The waiter left and returned quickly.“I’m sorry, sir，but we’ve just run
out of a dinosaur.”
” What?” said the diner with feigned disappointment.”No dinosaur?”
The waiter lowered his voice. “Well，we do have some left，“he whispered
confidentially,”…but it’s not very fresh and I won’t serve it!”
There was once a large，fat woman who had a small，thin husband. He had
a job in a big company and was given his weekly wages every Friday
evening. As soon as he got home on Fridays，his wife used to make hirn
give her all his money，and then she used to give him back only enough
to buy his lunch in the office every day.
One day the small man came home very excited. He hurried into the
living-room. His wife was listening to the radio and eating
chocolates.”You’ll never guess what happened to me today，dear,”he said.
He waited for a few seconds and then added:“I won ten thousand pounds on
“That’s wonderful!”said his wife delightedly. But then she thought for a
few seconds and added angrily，”But wait a moment! How could you afford
to buy the ticket?”.